I cast 'Adulation3' on you

Following recent reports of two boys who jumped to their deaths in the hopes of being reincarnated as ‘Slayers’ to battle demons, more of such stories of people taking their games a little too seriously has emerged.

Police has announced that a flurry of reports of lost articles has been recently reported, the unusual thing about these reports is the stolen objects in question are not of any value at all. Most commonly reported stolen items include keys, scissors, tape, magnets and other paraphernalia.

Not only that reports of missing items have been reported around neighbourhoods, things like rocks, advertising cutouts, it seems anything that is left unattended is being taken away. Police are making some headway into the investigation of this phenomenon, several people have been taken in for questioning when caught taking these items. All the people gave similar responses with reasons such as “you never know when they will come in handy” and “If I just have a bit of string I can use it together with this magnet and stick I have in my inventory and retrieve the key in the drain”.

Police have also started randomly checking any person carrying bulky backpacks, as this seems to be the prevailing mode of carrying the stolen objects which is commonly referred to as their ‘inventory’. These evidence suggest that the people are somehow working together.

In other related news, stores selling swords and other decorative weaponry has seen a tremendous increase in sales. The storeowner of Diadara’s weapon shop, Diadara tells us about the customers he receives, “They all seem to be interested in the more expensive items and also of the weapon’s size, they keep mumbling something about if its expensive its got to be good and how they need to upgrade their equipment for a difficult boss. However the problem is they usually want to pay me in some weird currency, just today I turned down zenny, gil, gold, bottlecaps and coins”.

More alarmingly, some of the people who have bought weapons have even appeared in public welding their giant swords, they also seem to like to gel their hair into spikes and wear clothes that have a lot of buttons or zippers. A member of the public commented on their appearance saying that they look “gay”. No reports that these sword-welding spiky-haired people have caused any injury to anyone yet, although it is reported that they would approach random passerbys and talk incoherently about a man dressed in black, crystals and dungeons.”

The hotel business has also benefited from these curious people, they would pay to take a short nap before leaving after commenting on how refreshed they were.

Not all of these people are as innocuous, a worrying trend of driving recklessly on the streets is giving the traffic police quite a headache. The reckless drivers are unfazed about the consequences of dangerous driving, when one driver was pulled out of the wreckage of his car he merely stated that the car would be alright after a while.

It also appears that people are engaging in impromptu fighting tournaments on the streets, these fights draw huge crowds silently cheering on the combatants while they enter a sort of trance and jump around one another and occasionally put their hands together with their palms facing out and shouting something sounding vaguely Japanese. This continues until one of them collapses from exhaustion.

The children have not been saved from this wave of strange behaviour, many pre-teen boys have started developing a form of Tourette’s syndrome, spouting racist epithets at the slightest provocation. It is not uncommon now to find schoolboys saying things like “Go wipe your dick on Hitler’s moustache, you Nazi faggot” while performing jerky squatting motions over the defeated supine form of another boy.

Experts believe that all this strange behaviour are signs that the world is coming to an end.